Last year I came across the February 2012 issue of Essence Magazine, where Gabrielle Union and boyfriend Dwayne Wade were on the cover. In this interview with Essence they said:
“We’re not rushing it. Both of us have been married before, and we understand that if we choose to marry again, we want it to be right. We both took failing at marriage hard. The next time it’s gotta be forever…” — Dwayne Wade
I thought good for them this is definitely the way to go. But, as I researched further into their love story, I realized it wasn’t the kind of “not rushing it” that we Christians are to follow.
When you hear the words “we’re not rushing it” or “we’re choosing to wait” what comes to mind?
- Wait until marriage to have sex?
- Or..let’s live together to see how it goes and see if we will get married?
If you thought wait meant: “sex after marriage” or “live together after marriage” this would be God’s way of going about it.
As more and more singles choose to live together, and engage in sex before marriage the conviction to wait no longer seems like the right thing to do and many love stories like the one shown above do not seem to help the single Christian who desires to please God first.
Let’s face it, being single in this: “if you aren’t hooked up with someone, something must be wrong with you type society,”could be extremely difficult. No wonder so many men and women feel the pressure to be with someone, anyone really, just to change their Facebook status into “in a relationship”, thinking, “there, I am no longer single now get off my back.”
Have you ever seen the roller coaster rides people put themselves on? This week they’re “in a relationship” and next week they’re “single.” In my book, an on-again, off-again relationship is described as a “Pothole.”
One day I plan on writing the Facebook headquarters to request a “Happy, Single , Ready & Waiting” button and of course a “Courting” button, because dating is not a relationship..another Pothole described in my book.
Well, enough about that let’s go back to Gabrielle and Wade and how far they’ve come in their relationship…
They broke up…- So you mean living together does not guarantee that you will actually get married? That’s right folks this is why it is not the right way to go especially if you are a Christian. Cohabitation is another “POTHOLE” described in my book. And let’s keep it real, I have yet to meet a couple who lived together and did not have sex….just sayin!
Then, they got back together….
“For us this was a big year for our relationship from the standpoint she was shooting her show, Being Mary Jane and gone most of the year. I was dealing with my injuries, trying to win a championship. So we kind of took a step back”, the NBA Champ stated.
Fortunately, Wade and Union realized what they had and that they didn’t want to lose it. “At the end of the day, we came back together and said we want to continue this and we want to get better each day. She’s been with me and I’ve been with her all summer long. We’re going strong now.” HIP HOLLYWOOD ARTICLE ON SEP 20th, 2013
Good for them!
For the record, a bit of back and forth is normal for any couple as their true feelings and how they make time for each other are put to the test. But, if this begins to get out of control you have fallen into the on-again off-again POTHOLE previously described.
Then FINALLY this Christmas, it happened!
Dwayne popped the question..and Gabrielle said YES!
But, not before the Wade/Union Christmas Photoshoot of which Gabrielle made the comment “But we’re not married”???? I agree Gabrielle this isn’t the best time to do photo’s like this especially with children involved…but hey you’ve come this far….hmmmmmm
Take a look
This video was definitely fun to watch and I wish them all the best in their REAL UNION before God, family and friends.
Do you struggle in the area of waiting?
Consider reading my book Single, Ready & Waiting: Your Guide to Courtship.
Do you struggle with moving too fast?
The Single, Ready & Waiting: Your Guide to Courtship will help you to avoid those speeding tickets and find the lane that leads to a stronger foundation in marriage.
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